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help please.

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bb4444
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Joined: Tue Mar 21, 2017 12:59 pm
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Location: north east

help please.

Postby bb4444 » Tue Mar 21, 2017 2:17 pm

hi i'm new to the forum and could do with some help on what i am, ive read quite a few posts and see many cross dress. my cross dressing is very sexual and its the only time i like to do it, also i only do it with women and never on my own. i like to dress up as part of role play. i am straight (i think) so i'm unsure if cross dressing is just a role play fantasy thing for me or more. i am quite submissive when i wear my cloths. i was looking at posts and saw a picture of Davina and someone like that would be my fantasy, so what does that make me. i like women's underwear but wigs and makeup have never really bothered me though Ive never really tried them. sorry if my post is a bit strange but like a say i'm not 100% sure if i fall into a category.

thanks for any help

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DebbieT
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Joined: Mon Apr 16, 2012 10:05 am
Preference: Transitioning Female
Location: East Manchester

Re: help please.

Postby DebbieT » Tue Mar 21, 2017 2:46 pm

The general rule of thumb is that categories are largely meaningless.

You are who you are.

Debbie

bb4444
Registered users
Posts: 12
Joined: Tue Mar 21, 2017 12:59 pm
Preference: Male (Straight)
Location: north east

Re: help please.

Postby bb4444 » Tue Mar 21, 2017 3:12 pm

well yes you are right, and Ive always believe you are what you are and you shouldn't judge others, but sadly it doesn't stop me getting a bit confused on what i am or what i want. but thanks

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Georgina
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Preference: Male to Female Crossdresser
Location: Sheffield area, UK

Re: help please.

Postby Georgina » Fri Mar 24, 2017 11:13 am

If you're lucky, you'll never fit in a box.

It's easy to find yourself going down a rabbit hole, with questions like "am I this or that ?" For me i ended up reading work of people like Blanchard and trying to fit myself in. I got really bogged down and felt like I couldn't breathe

Relax, be yourself. The answers are your own

Georgina
It is not why, it just is

bb4444
Registered users
Posts: 12
Joined: Tue Mar 21, 2017 12:59 pm
Preference: Male (Straight)
Location: north east

Re: help please.

Postby bb4444 » Fri Mar 24, 2017 2:54 pm

thanks

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Sara.G
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Preference: P/T T-Girl
Location: South Wales, UK

Re: help please.

Postby Sara.G » Tue Mar 28, 2017 12:54 am

If you really need to have a label (some people do) then how about this - you are uniquely you and will constantly develop as you progress down your journey of self-discovery.

The key words are unique(ly), develop, journey and self-discovery.

The advice that goes with them are be true to yourself and be as truthful as you can - especially when discussing this subject with loved ones. You will never know what you actually like unless you try.

Admiring girls such as Davina or whoever is fine, but try to discover yourself rather than making yourself into a "clone" of someone else. This can be a highly personal thing for many of us and some find that the initial sexual aspect diminishes as they progress to dressing more frequently. The majority are straight (when applied to their birth gender) although some are not and with others their preference stays constant whether they are in either persona - so don't worry too much about any pre-concieved ideas or fantasies, these are normal and may be an assertion of what your actual gender mix is (there are very few people in reality who are 100% male or female - all humans usually have some degree or other of both genders in our make-up).

One last point - if it feels right then it usually reflects how you feel at that point in time - with some the urge is constant (which can be frustrating if opportunities are seldom) but others follow a more cyclic pattern where they swing between dressing and not dressing (the latter can be due to guilt about dressing, convincing yourself it is wrong or simply that the urge isn't there).

The only strange questions are those you wouldn't ask yourself to answer and the only stupid ones are those you don't ask (stupid because you will never know the answer if you don't ask). Even if it seems a simple question, for example "Is there an easy way to put a bra on?", you won't be ridiculed for asking as there are probably many out there who struggle to do this without getting frustrated.
"Denying who you really are, only leads to regrets later in life. Seize the moment because it will never come around again."

I have been reliably informed that I am a much bigger bitch when I am NOT Sara!!!!

bb4444
Registered users
Posts: 12
Joined: Tue Mar 21, 2017 12:59 pm
Preference: Male (Straight)
Location: north east

Re: help please.

Postby bb4444 » Tue Mar 28, 2017 7:39 am

thanks for that, a very good way at looking at it.

bb4444
Registered users
Posts: 12
Joined: Tue Mar 21, 2017 12:59 pm
Preference: Male (Straight)
Location: north east

Re: help please.

Postby bb4444 » Tue Mar 28, 2017 8:57 am

hi again, i should maybe explain my confusion more. i no i'm a cross dresser and have been for years. even though its more of a fetish thing for me and about submission, i still love women underwear and cloths. so i'm a cross dresser and love it. my sexuality the confusing thing for me. i would say i'm straight but wonder if i am bi. i read a post on here and its seems that many people are bi but just don't admit it. ive never found men unattractive or attractive. when i cross dress i like it to be with women. but recently ive notice more and more that if i look at transgender or very famine looking cross dressers, then i get just as turned on. the fact that there men still doesn't worry me and i still get the same erges. now without going into details witch could be wrong on here. more and more i'm thinking the things i like to do when i dress up, well it wouldn't matter what sex the person is. so i think deep down i may be bi. though as said does it really matter you are what you are.

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DebbieT
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Location: East Manchester

Re: help please.

Postby DebbieT » Tue Mar 28, 2017 3:30 pm

When you look at somebody presenting female, you're turned on by that. So you find women attractive.

I'd say that makes you straight.

But, personally, I think everybody is bi. They might better repress the same gender urges, or feel them less, or just not met the same gender person that would do it for them....

Let's face it, even when one is so called straight, some women aren't going to turn one on...they're not one's type. And that's all it boils down to. Who is your type?

After that, hope that you're their type and you can both have a merry old time.

Debbid

bb4444
Registered users
Posts: 12
Joined: Tue Mar 21, 2017 12:59 pm
Preference: Male (Straight)
Location: north east

Re: help please.

Postby bb4444 » Tue Mar 28, 2017 6:44 pm

so does the fact that i know there mail and still get turned on by them, and the fact that they turn me on make me bi. i think the answer would have to be even if i new they were mail, if the turn me on would under the right circumstances would i have fun with them. my answer would be problem yes.

off coarse you are 100% right on looks, many times in life Ive had the opportunity with women and ive declined because i wasn't attracted to them, and recently during some experimentation that very thing happened.

please dot get me wrong, we are what we are and i suspect i could be bi in some way. the reason i may not be sure is Ive never had the chance to explore.

thanks good reply and as long as everyone has fun does it matter.


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